Time Line

Some people say to me
With good intentions
Possible discomfort
– or lack of experience
It’s time to move forward
Start living your life
Reminding me repeatedly
I am no longer married to you
I am no longer your wife
Hold your head up sweet darling
You don’t need to cry – anymore
…that is not what he would have wanted
That is not what his death was for…
Sadly he lost his right to want anything
When he left this place of existence
That night he took not only his last breath
But my path of least resistance
Leaving behind a blue vase
A dozen beautiful white roses
That crashed without warning
Tiny irreplaceable pieces onto the floor
A love note of forever and forever
– and then never more
There is no subtle way to share or explain
And as I have said before – there is no time limit
On grieving or the depth of the pain
The process of moving from here to there
To know the finality of death – if ever
Nothing ever feels right
Nothing ever seems fair
And once that gut wrenching poison
Seeped deep into my heart
And took hold – there was no time
…and truth be told
It eventually became the norm –
It has found its safe haven
it has found its home
It wakes me in the middle of the night
Stealing away any sense of peace
A prisoner of my own confine
A battle within – a battle I continue to fight
A sweet reverie only to be replaced
By childhood demons that move so slowly
The demons we battled and put to rest
So many years ago
The vivid colors and visuals
Of that moment in time
…one night seven years ago
There is no sensible reason
They have not faded they remain sublime
Yesterday is not just a memory
It has become a way of life
And maybe that is all part of some empirical plan
Giving us a story we can hold onto
– to breathe easy when there is no rhyme
To engage that perfect fit
– the perfection in our own disguise …
The balance between
All the good and all the bad
Life experiences the happy
– and the sad
To share the joke
That is on you/me with someone
Who will not judge
The error of our ways
Or the fear of being abandoned
– and always feeling safe
Without having to say a word
A simple look deep into each others eyes
Knowing nothing
Should be taken for granted
…a heartfelt word to the wise
Truly knowing everything will be fine
And you and I knew it all too well
We just didn’t know the length – of our time line…

© 2014 TrilbyYates

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